I have often asked people I come across these two questions:
- Have you ever seen a UFO?
- Have you ever won the Lotto for more than $10000?
The outcome has been as follows: I know 4 people (including myself) who have seen a UFO. And I know ZERO people who have won the Lotto.
Now, this kind of makes you think. You can logically come up with three conclusions from this Data.
- The odds of winning the Lotto are higher than seeing a UFO.
- Lotto Winners don’t exist.
- Or, there is a comprehensive conspiracy to hush up Lotto winners.
I believe in the last conclusion. And I’ll prove it with a true family story.
In 1972, my aunt won $2,500 from a scratch off lottery ticket. Now, back then this was a lot of money. She could have gone out and bought either a Chevy Vega, or AMC Gremlin with her winnings. She started telling the family that she won, and then the next day, a strange man in a black pin stripe suit visited her. He had a brief case and dark sunglasses. After he left, my grandmother gave her a call to see what he wanted and my Aunt wouldn’t tell her. She wouldn’t say a word and she started to develop a nervous tick.
She went from being “Lotta Bucks Lola” to “Nervous Tick Lola”. All this because of a couple of lousy bucks.
About two years after this, my mother and I were walking into Twin Fair department store. It was near sunset and the sun was behind our backs. My mother parked far away because she didn’t want any of the carts to hit her car. As we were walking towards the store a bright circular object appeared in the sky and zipped around in straight angular lines. It went back and forth SUPER fast. It also made these severe acute angles and then a few seconds later it zipped away like George Jetson.
I asked my mother if she saw it and she agreed that it was a UFO. I started to tell a few people and they looked at me weird, so I stopped telling people. But the point of this story, is that the Man in the Pin Striped Suit never showed up.
Maybe aliens abduct all the lotto winners and take their cash for spaceship fuel and whatnot.
ReplyDeleteMy dad plays those scratch off lottery tickets and although he didn't "win" he did get a ticket with the word "win" on it three times. Having such ticket was like finding a Wonka gold ticket. It got him on TV to play on the Cash Explosion show. He won. BIG. A man didn't come to my parents house but he did call on the phone. Not from a UFO but from the IRS telling my pops they were taking his money to pay back child support to his ex wife. My dad developed a nervous tick too. Every other word for months after that was a swear word. Like he got a case of Tourette's or somethin.
ReplyDeleteThat wasn't a UFO. It was the government checking up on you. My theory about you & this blog is that you were some kind of genetic experiment. It's the only answer I can come up with.
ReplyDeleteNukie, there's something I think I need to tell you...
ReplyDeleteLIFE is a conspiracy!
I join you in the UFO, seeing group. Chalk me up for 3 siting. I was not under the infulence for 2 of them. But I'm sure this is not a shock to any one. I have said it before and I'll say it again, now, I am special.
ReplyDeleteLottery winner, I hear you have to play to win.
Come on, let's ride to se the UFO tomorrow! lol
ReplyDeleteplease visit a biker babe's blog http://www.bikerkiss.com/blog/jennifer
I go away to Maryland for a while, and when I return... Miniscule Bibbles gets a series of entries worth reading. I may go away more often. Try not to ruin the streak. I don't want to put too much pressure on you I wouldn't want you to develop another tick. Pretty soon you'd be ticking every second. With your arms slowly swinging around in clockwise motions. People looking at you to figure out the time.
ReplyDeleteI wish I went to Twin Fair that day. But, I guess I'm the one that found the miniature dinosaur.
Don't get nervous.
- Wak
- Wak
Wait...I HAVE seen a UFO. It was when I was college. I wasn't drunk yet.
ReplyDelete